Return to Sender

Downtown, in certain areas of Pittsburgh (and possibly elsewhere, I suspect), there exists a powerful entity, who I have dubbed “the rose man.” I have encountered the rose man on several occasions, and each experience has been a bit more unnerving than the last. Usually, our meetings go a little something like this: I am walking down the street with my sister, and the rose man materializes a few feet away, clutching an armful of roses.

“A pretty flower for a pretty lady? It’s free,” he croons, beckoning me to take one of his precious roses to give to my sister.

Typically, at this point, I notice the sinister glint in his eye and simply decline his cunning offer. It’s much safer this way; however, on one fateful occasion, I decided to accept his “gift.” I mean, it was a free ROSE, people. I’m sure my sister was just dying to have one. And, really, what harm could it do? (Ha. I was once a fool.) Squealing with glee (well…perhaps not squealing, per se…but you get the point), the rose man placed a bright red rose in my hand and told me how beautiful my sister was and how she deserved an equally beautiful rose (of course, by now, my sister--being the more intelligent of the Hart children--had already ducked into a nearby bookstore). I’m fairly certain that I chuckled nervously at this point and started to move in the opposite direction, mumbling my thanks, when he placed an arm around my shoulder.

“Now, how about donating some money to _________ organization?” he rasped in my ear. Sadly, upon hearing that I was, in fact, a poor college student who had no cash, he plucked the rose out of my hands, snarling something about how nothing’s really free and how, if my sister really meant a lot to me, I would have coughed up some money.

A pleasant experience overall, I’d say.

Now, I didn’t disclose the tale of the rose man merely to warn you never to accept flowers—or candy, for that matter—from strangers (although…come to think of it, that’s probably a decent lesson to learn, as well). I was just pondering the complexities of life (or something similarly vague), and I realized how rarely we give without expecting anything in return.

Please understand; I’m not saying that the world would be a better place if hundreds of rose men peppered the streets, hurling flowers at everyone just for the joy of giving. That…would actually be immensely frightening, I think. But it occurred to me (and I’m sure many of you have already thought about this before) how easy it is to simply give, but how difficult it is to give without receiving any sort of praise or reward in return. I’ll admit that, even while I might believe that I’m giving selflessly, I still often expect some sort of acknowledgement for my efforts—even if it’s just a simple “thank you.” Is that inherently bad? Probably not… I mean, it’s nice to be appreciated, certainly. But that’s not the point of giving.

So, what’s the solution? I’ve often thought about how much better it would be to give anonymously—to do something kind for a friend without letting him or her know that I was even involved in the act. In essence, this would benefit the person just the same, without allowing any unnecessary praise for me…because, really, it’s God who should be glorified for our acts of kindness—not us. And that’s what really needs to shine through in my life, I think.

I guess the whole “giving anonymously” isn’t practical in every situation. I mean, I’m not going to buy a birthday present for someone and then leave it on his or her doorstep, unsigned…encouraging him or her to think that I forgot about his or her (note: I am thoroughly SICK of this singular pronoun agreement...) birthday entirely. Nor would it be possible to, say, help someone with his or her homework anonymously (unless you left a series of post-it notes all over his or her desk, detailing how to complete the assignment…but…somehow, I doubt that that would be very highly appreciated) or hold the door for someone anonymously… Still, it’s a challenging thought—difficult to put into practice. It’s something that I want to work on.

Well, I'm sorry that this post has been bogged down with so many disjointed thoughts...and no real conclusion. I think I’m still getting back into gear with the whole “blog every week” thing. Oh well. Just beware: the next time I hold a door for you, I might flee the scene before you can see me, thus…allowing the door to swing shut…in your face. Giving…anonymously…right? Hmmm…I suppose I need to work out that plan a little better, don’t I?

Anyway, thanks for reading!